Thursday, September 02, 2004❤ lEt mI dIe
3:05 PM
when you grabbed me yesterday, i was so touched, didn't expected you to do it. that's why i smiled back at you. but i just can't stop walking. its either i run all the way and punch at something or i would just squatt down and start crying..
from the carpark, i saw u replying my message before walking into the lift. i didn't try to stop you. then i went below your block and sat on the floor. tears began to drop as i remembered the times we had together..
i felt the pain in my heart hearing from you that we can't be together. my hopes shattered and promises vanished. i went to the top floor of the multi-storey carpark and wanted to jump down from there, hoping that you would remember me, forever. i gazed down, and enjoy the cool breeze for a few mintues. without realising, my crying stopped. maybe that's the only way i can be a true hero. then i began to think of what i did in the past, my friends, shouldn't have vent my angers on them. parents, shouldn't have been so rude to them. koh bin, i have forgiven him. weihong, sandy, jacksen, teckhao, elana, so many people. and all the wrong things i have done in the past. so i decided to call them one by one to bid farewell. just then, i received your call. you said we still have a chance..
i went back to toa payoh, still didn't dare to make any promises yet. i let you down. sorry. i wanted to give you happiness, develop a perfect relationship, like "My Sassy Girl" but..
then i came to another multi-storey carpark near my house and make my final decision. i can't lose you, honey. i don't want our story to end here. i love you..
there, i cried till about 4 in the morning..
